Potty training always seems like a daunting challenge. I wanted to share some methods that have worked for us, in hopes that it helps you too.
The short story: In my experience, potty training will be dependent on your little one.
When Eli was 2, we were set on potty training in order to enroll her in Pre-K. For two days, we basically let her hang naked around the house. The flooring was tile so cleaning any spills was easy. We used a soft potty training seat that sits on top of the toilet. This type of seat make the toilet seat opening smaller to avoid falls and give kids the confidence to sit. I didn’t want to have an additional toilet to clean therefore this seemed like the best option.
When it came to Emi, our flooring was entirely carpet therefore I wasn’t looking forward to the naked method. Her potty training was actually very easy and not at all what I expected. We started introducing a potty around 9 months when she started walking. Slowly she transitioned from cloth diaper to training panties. Occasionally she used cloth and disposable diaper, for air travel, doctor appointments and long car rides but it wasn’t really necessary.She was completely potty trained and accident free by 15 months.
What I think helped us the most was her personality; she never liked feeling wet. Whenever we used disposable diapers, she would cry with a single drop of pee. She was so sensitive that the diaper line wouldn’t register it as soiled but she would need to be changed in order to stop crying.
Considering she gave us signals to change her diaper since birth, it was easy to understand when she needed the potty. We got her a potty that had a low profile in order for her to crawl or walk to it and sit by herself. She quickly learned how to find it and would make my job easier.
Eppie was an entirely different story from my previous two but the same general tips apply:
Tip 1: Listen to your kiddo. Check for signals that they are ready to potty train. For example Eppie wasn’t one to complain as a baby but by the time she was 16 months she started to touch her diaper and a month later she started saying “pee”. While she wasn’t ready to use the potty, she did start to signal before she went. Recognizing the “need to go” feeling is step one.
Tip 2: Make sure the toilet is the correct size for your little one. Using a smaller or bigger one might cause discomfort and make the transition harder. You want their feet flat on the floor while knees are higher than their hips. For traveling and public restrooms, use disposable or folding potties.
Tip 3: Set the potty in an accessible location for your toddler. If they can crawl or walk to it, it will help them reach the potty faster therefore avoiding accidents especially in the beginning when they give seconds notice. We kept one the living room as most of our time is spent there but also had one in the bathroom.
Tip 4: If your kid develops fear to the potty, change their environment. If you are able to, change your potty. If it’s only a fear of public restrooms, it could be the automatic flushing. Give them time, don’t force them to go in these spaces until they feel more confident at home. You want to make them feel safe and confident to avoid accidents. If they don’t feel safe, they will start holding. Holding their pee can cause a urinary tract infection and over time, develop incontinence.
Here are some little tips to help them go when they refuse:
1. Getting their hands wet
2. Drinking a juice box while sitting in the potty
3. Sit on the potty while a parent or sibling goes potty
Tip 5: If they don’t start using the potty, give them time.Trying and trying day after day can be frustrating for both parents and kids. They might get angry or cry and we don’t want them to associate the potty with negative feelings therefore if this starts happening, take a break and try again after a week or two. Some kiddos just need time. Even in cases of twins, one might potty train in a few days while the other takes a few months. All kids are different.
Tip 6: Probably the most important tip of all is to give your kiddo lots of undivided attention during this time. Positive reinforcement, love, affection, and pride when they are successful will make a real difference. Celebrate every step because each step is progress towards your goal. Celebrate when they communicate, and so on. Make it fun and encourage the behavior.
Tip 7: Switch to cloth diapers or cotton/bamboo training underwear. Disposable diapers absorb a lot and will dry the area quickly. While we think this is good, it can actually be a setback since they aren’t making the connection between pee and wetness. When they start feeling wet and understanding why, this causes most kids to successfully start using the potty to avoid that wetness.
Good to know:
- It is normal for kids to learn how to pee in the potty before going poo in the potty. It might take a few weeks for them to do both on the toilet. Try to change them quickly so they don’t get comfortable with the idea of a soiled diaper.
- Some kids can take a while to potty, again, have patience and wait with them. You can read to your child books during this time.
- If your child is in daycare, communicate with the staff of their signals and progress.
- Boys should sit to potty and learn to aim after potty trained as this avoids boys from decision making when starting and making it easier to learn.
Which potty do we recommend:
After trying 6 different brands, our favorite for small kids is the Smart Potty. For kiddos over 36″ we prefer the Chair
For travel we love this folding seat and although under $15, it has served us for over 5 years. It covers regular toilet seats well and the opening is small enough that kids feel safe.
Last but not least, Breathe. You got this!
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